Wednesday, January 28, 2009

They tricked us, my precious!

Hmph. We did such a great job at chaperoning the humans that we put The Other One really out of sorts when I started threatening to knock things over even though she'd blearily gotten up to feed me just minutes earlier. They both slammed the door and shut me out of their room. Showed 'em. I zipped out the cat door and started howling under their window for them to let me back in. The Other One, now thoroughly and grumpily awake, was totally ruined for the morning. No need to continue the chaperoning.

But they tricked us, they did! Just when we figured our sentry duty was done for the weekend I wandered in and caught them with amazingly smug grins on their faces. Mission foiled! Even Elfstone was caught completely off guard. He was trying to tell me he'd been watching them the whole time. My cat senses, however, were not deceived.

Wednesday, January 21, 2009

A little comment on going to digital TV signals

funny pictures of cats with captions
more animals

We have a converter box. We have the fancy antenna. But we get TV with the audio and visual out of sync and a signal that breaks a lot. How was this supposed to be better, again?

Monday, January 12, 2009

We interrupt these cats for...

A little discussion about the Pacific Northwest, credited to Jeff Foxworthy:

Subject: The Pacific Northwest According To Jeff Foxworthy

You are a Bona Fide Northwesterner if....

1. You know the state flower..... (Mildew) (Oregon and Washington), Idaho is Russian Thistle.)

2. You feel guilty throwing aluminum cans or paper in the trash.

3. You use the statement "sun break" and know what it means.

4. You know more than 10 ways to order coffee.

5. You know more people who own boats than air conditioners.

6. You feel overdressed wearing a suit to a nice restaurant.

7. You stand on a deserted corner in the rain waiting for the "Walk" signal.

8. You consider that if it has no snow or has not recently erupted, it is not a real mountain.

9. You can taste the difference between Starbucks, Seattle's Best, and Veneto's.

10. You know the difference between Chinook, Coho and Sockeye salmon.

11. You know how to pronounce Sequim, Puyallup, Issaquah, Oregon,Yakima and Willamette.

12. You consider swimming an indoor sport.

13. You can tell the difference between Japanese, Chinese and Thai food.

14. In winter, you go to work in the dark and come home in the dark-while working only eight-hour days.

15. You never go camping without waterproof matches and a poncho.

16. You are not fazed by "Today's forecast: Showers followed by rain," and "Tomorrow's forecast: rain followed by showers."

17. You have no concept of humidity without precipitation

18. You know that Boring is a town in Oregon and not just a state of mind.

19. You can point to at least two volcanoes, even if you cannot see them through the cloud cover.

20. You notice, "The Mountain is out" whenever it is a pretty day and you can actually see it.

21 . You put on your walking shorts when the temperature gets above 50, but still wear your hiking boots and parka.

22. You switch to your sandals when it gets about 60F., but keep your socks on.

23. You have actually ridden your mountain bike on a mountain.

24. You think people who use umbrellas are either wimps or tourists.

25. You buy new sunglasses every year, because you cannot find the old ones after not using them for a full 12 months.

26. You measure driving distance in hours.

27. You often switch from "heat" to "a/c" in the same day.

28 You design your kid's Halloween costume to fit under a raincoat.

29. You know all the important seasons: Almost Winter, Winter, Late Winter, Still
Raining (Spring), Road Construction (Summer), Deer & Elk season (Fall).

30. You actually understood these jokes and will probably forward them.

Sunday, January 11, 2009

How to Immobilize Humans

It's easy.
Wedge between them in the middle of the night.
Purr loudly.
Refuse to move when pushed. After you wake up, start leisurely washing paws
while sending roots into the bedcovers. Repeat for several hours in the morning.
They'll never know what hit em.
AND they certainly can't get into any kind of mischief while Acorn Oakmist is
on duty!

Tuesday, January 6, 2009

Hooks for the humans

in the form of our cat hair. We're setting them everywhere: on the chairs, the futons, and the clothes. Even wearing the green robe inside out won't work. We're on to that trick. The hooks on the end of our cat hair will embed on the inside and on the outside. Humans, be warned: if you get clothes matching our fur, you won't be able to see it till it hits you hard. If you get color contrasting clothes, it's there for all the world to see. In either event , YOU ARE OURS. (Cat glee ensues!)

Sunday, January 4, 2009

I swear that cat can teleport...

Hello from Elfstone,
My mom just wandered into the spare room just before the witching hour of midnight and found me sleeping peacefully on the futon. It completely startled her because she'd been going room to room looking for me, thinking maybe I was out in the freezing fog and the moonlight. And she had Looked Right There about three times. Hence, her remark.

Acorn is nestled in a blanket on the futon in the living room. No attempt at invisibility there, he made sleepy cat noises and demanded attention and ruffles.

Can I really teleport? Not telling...

Thursday, January 1, 2009

Fur Coats

..relax, animal lovers. They're on us. Not our humans. And it's a good thing we have them. It has been so very wet! Our coats are lovely and thick and the rain won't get through Elfstone's fur at all. My orange fur is calculated to make any rain think twice before landing on it. So we're good.

Now if we can only cure those crazy humans of getting themselves wet ON PURPOSE. We keep having to re-establish our ownership marks on them every time that happens. *Rub.*