Greetings from Elfstone Chestnut Pussycat,
While the humans are busy fussing over my big brother Acorn and giving him treats and pets (and hauling him back and forth in that box thing... I can smell vet!!), I am plotting about what to do to get them to remember sweet innocent starving moi. Appearances can be deceptive you know. So I'm well...rather stout.... but I haven't eaten people food in THIRTY WHOLE SECONDS... Oh, the cruelty...
On the other hand I just can't grab their attention if that means they'll haul ME to the vet. Oh no. Quick, think clouded mind thoughts at the humans: You will not take Elfstone to the vet. There is no vet. You will feed me and fuss over me and go nowhere with me except into the kitchen. Human One can stop being vegetarian, too, by the way. That Will Not Do. No bacon for me in months....and Human Two gives more treats to Acorn ...that chicken, for example... she must have given Acorn an entire extra sliver!
And while I'm at it Human Two really needs to be home more.. She's gone all the time! I have no clue what "supporting you in the lifestyle to which you are accustomed" is all about. I did get a mental image from her addled brain when she got home the other night. It involved a flood of paper everywhere in a cold room. So much paper you couldn't see what it was set on, let alone seeing to the bottom of it... Humans have no idea that we can see their thoughts. We just don't always understand what the fuss is all about; humans are such limited creatures!
It's dark now. I must think at Human Two and pull her homewards...
Love and purrs,
Elfstone Chestnut Pussycat On the Prowl
A middle-aged kid with a lively curiosity and equal parts shyness and insane humor. I just need to get all three to stop fighting with each other. I am an enthusiastic dabbler in poetry, practice law, cast spells, and am owned by two cats. Mostly the cats are running this blog nowadays.